Preparation of Sleep Apnea surgery, No food or drink 12 hours prior. Like any other surgery, this may have 1% boundary case probability, that I may not come back. Meditation and continuously watching my thoughts helped me a lot, I am amazed how calm and quite I am from inside. I am at ease like a floating clouds. This is not because, I am trying something, I am just calm at the core, there is no fear.
12/6
Check-in at the hospital is same like chek-in in a hotel. Very nice reception,a huge waterfall next to check in counter. I am amazed why i am not least worried about any thing. May be i am exteremly dumb and foolish, nothing bothers me. But i can see Azan and Afrin are worried from inside, and hiding it with the fake exterior calmness.
Surgery started by 1 PM. They have big monitors showing status of my surgery outside to my family, I was just wondering why it cannot be on web so my parents can see the status too, this is the last thought I had before the drugs hit me.
Back in the recovery room by 3 PM. And all the hell break loose, there is excruciating pain in my throat. They drugged me good, so I am dosing off and on with the pain in my throat. Want to be with the pain, want to win over it with my meditation, it is so intense that I can feel the area in throat vibrating, I feel as if I am trying to swallow a lump of burning coal, I am with the pain but I cannot push it in background.
People say religion is good, In hospital science and logic does not come to visit you, you are left with your god, your religion and your people. But the pain is so much, so bad that no amount of prayer will help, the whole humanity can pray for me, but nothing will help me like few drops of narcotics … when you need science, you need science.
12/12
It’s been seven days, I am still on liquid diet. As soon as the medicine wears out pain starts in throat. I need to go to narcotics like a drug addicts. Still having problem in speaking. Like any other thing, there is silver lining to this whole thing, I am losing weight, almost a pound per day. Today after noon, after drugging myself I tried to eat plain rice but could not go beyond few spoons …
12/14
Still feeling like a fish on a hook. Pain in throat is exactly as a fish may be feeling when a hook is on her throat and she is pulled with it. Now, I am delaying the medicine till the point of unbearable pain, I want to get off the medicine as soon as possible. With the medicine, you are so drowsy that you are useless and without it you are a withering fish. Tomorrow, I am seeing the doctor, let’s see how long this torment is going to last …
12/15
Splinters from nose is removed. Doctors says this is the last week for my pain, from next week onwards I may not need any pain killer. Lets see how it goes. Today tried to eat some rice, but pain was too much, tried to eat some ice cream, but could not enjoy it. Funny side effect of Narcotics, no more hunger … and now the pain is assosiated with eating so I am no more interested in eating. I hope this aversion to food continues on ….
12/18
Much better, solid food started since yestrerday, but there is no taste yet, most probably because of fever. Still having slight fever all day long.
Update after a year from Surgery: This surgery did not help as expected. I still snore, sleep is restless. May be my condition is improved, but it is so little that I don’t realize it. Everyone is different, who knows it may help you.
Watch your thoughts 